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This weekend has been dedicated to doing nothing and just milling about.
I am reading Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows. I'm about 1/6 through with the book already and I just began reading it Saturday evening. It's quite addictive. I waited until the last book came out before I read the Half Blood Prince because I didn't want to wait. I wanted to read it through. Now, I'll have to go back and read books 1-7 in completion. I think the effect will be different.

I also took my bike out this weekend for some heavy trekking. Saturday, because the weather was nice and not humid and just generally pleasant, I rode it all the way down to Coney Island. I used my sense of navigation rather than use a map or a compass. I figure if I know some of the subway stops, I could maneuver my way around. I was able to get onto the other side of the Belt Parkway and ride alongside the water until Toys R Us. It took me about a total of 1 1/2 hours to get there and then back. On my way back, I caught a glimpse of 2 accidents. One where the fire fighters came and were trying to open the hood of a minivan. Another where I saw a man lying on a stretcher. And of course, I almost was run over on 4th Avenue and 19th Street by some guy who wasn't looking in front of him. He came within 5 inches from my bike. The good thing is that he wasn't moving very quickly. He had just pulled into the side and was about to pull out again.

Sunday I cleaned the kitchen. It was very very messy. And then waited till the sun wasn't too hot to take another bike ride. I have never ridden my bike to Williamsburg, so I thought I would give that a try. I got lost. With no cell phone on me and no compass, I went around in a circle before I hit Bedford Stuyvesant and realised I had gotten to the Bedford Nostrand stop on the G train. From there on out, I knew exactly where I was going. Getting there took me about 1 1/2 hours, but getting back only took 40 minutes. Really about the same time as it takes me to go over the Manhattan bridge from Park Slope. I do the ride without stopping now. It's pretty incredible that it only took me a short while to develop the stamina and endurance. I must be in pretty good shape. I have the drive...now all I have to do is apply it to my career and where that is going.

I signed up to Facebook today. I got several emails from friends and colleagues to join. So I did. I originally deleted the account because I did not want to be associated with Pace University. I have the option to not be a part of it now. It's a relief to also see that anyone can sign up to Facebook now. I felt it was detrimental for it to only be available to students and those with an email address that ended with EDU. There's a lot of new things now. Little applications that I've just put on my page. It's fun. Now if MySpace had something like that. I found out that my brother, stepsisters are all using it. Oh well...I guess I'll just have to join the crowd.

The last week or so

The last week or so have been the most productive I have seen in my life since I graduated college. It was sad to learn a month ago that I couldn't agree to a relationship that I have been having for almost 2 years now. It was also very difficult when earlier this month I learned that my only living grandfather had a severe stroke that caused paralysis on the left side of his body and forcing his right eye to droop. I don't know my grandfather very well, but I hear that he taught me how to walk when I was a baby. I guess if it wasn't for him, I would have started walking later in life. I have him to thank. I'm sure my parents have him to thank for that too, or maybe I am wrong. If I walked later in life, perhaps I wouldn't have driven my parents crazy by disappearing whenever they let me roam around.

Since what happened with my grandfather and the recent sad events, I am starting to take a different approach. I think one of the main reasons I can't have a relationship--a serious one is because I don't know myself at all. You can't love someone if you don't know them and you certainly can't love another person if you aren't able to love yourself. It's time to do some soul searching. I think it's also time to re-evaluate what I want in life. I'm in need to achieve the maximum capacity because right now, I'm young. Hehehe...

I recently met up with an acquaintance of mine, Max. Our lives seem to run parallel to each other. He recently broke up, and he just got his driver's license too. Hmm...*scratches chin* I got mine back in January this year. Anyway, we talked about acting and about keeping as busy as possible. I went to see his play Crazy Little Thing and during it, I shifted in my seat and heard a rip. :-( It was my pair of jeans that I had been wearing for the last 4-5 years. I guess it was going to happen sooner or later. I mean I already had a huge hole in the right pant leg. Maybe I'll turn it into some Hot Pants. :-) I'm convinced that I should start taking acting classes and start putting myself out there for auditions.

I'm currently working on a Science Fiction Feature Film in New York City called Transbeman. So until I am finished with this, I really can't submit myself to any Casting Directors. I guess I'll have to wait till this is done. But in the meantime, I've been submitting myself to several auditions through websites. I actually went to one audition this past Saturday and was cast in a student short film called The Plan. Shocking. I've only been to one audition! Doesn't it usually take 50 before you land a role?

I'm also pulling jobs out of my ass. I've gotten 4 calls about working as a PA, 3 calls for working as an electrician in Theatre and 1 call for a role in a student short film. :-\ I've said yes to 2 Theatre productions. One with Louis Lopardi, whom I work with every year on The Fresh Fruit Festival. I think this year it's going to be at the Cherry Lane. Then I've got a Fringe Festival Play. Something called Andrea Gothic.

My schedule is packed. I did spend $200 on clothes this Saturday. After auditioning, I had my watch battery replaced for my Tag Heuer. Then I went to H&M and Old Navy. I cannot stress how difficult it is to find jeans that fit for a woman!!!! The cuts for jeans and trousers are getting worse and worse for women. Nothing fits me comfortably. I like wearing jeans at the waist (belly button region). I hate it when they come out with jeans that are soo low that your cooch peeks out from the top. I don't know about you, but I like having my pants on. I don't like having them sliding off my ass or clinging to my ass. I like loose jeans and pants. Airy. No chafing then. And of course when the warm weather comes around, I can't wear any of these jeans because my sweat soaks the jeans and they become sticky thus causing me to take a 2nd shower in the day. How annoying and wasteful of time? I'm soo fucking upset about this. I think from now on, I will start shopping in the men's department for jeans. STUPID FUCKING DESIGNERS. Also stop making frilly clothing! I DON'T FUCKING LIKE LACE! I CERTAINLY DON'T LIKE CLOTHES THAT POOF OUT FROM THE BREASTS DOWN THAT THEY MAKE A PERSON LOOK LIKE THEY'RE 3 MONTHS PREGNANT. What the fuck is wrong with the world? FUCK YOU ALL AND YOUR STUPID CLOTHING DESIGNS. The only thing I need in my clothes are colours. I like colours...lots of them.

Life as a Background

Well, recently I've been working not as a Production Assistant. But as a background actor. In fact, I've been in 3 television shows already! First in Ft. Pit. You may just be able to see me in the background inside the police precinct.

Then I had a walking bit on The Sopranos. Of which, my roommate, Morgan, suggested that I bring a gun and start shooting up the set. To go along with it, yell out "How dare you steal Infernal Affairs!". I met a lot of other Chinese Americans. Old, young, and all with American accents rather than Chinese accents. It was a night shoot in the freezing rain right before it turned to ice. It was brutal. I got home at 2AM only to find out that I had to be on the set of another show in Yonkers by 10AM.

Yep, I had to get up at 4:30am to catch the courtesy bus to Yonkers in the UWS. You can actually see me in the background of the court room. I'm to be called back for 3 more days! Yea! I'm getting paid and being fed.

I know, I know, being an extra or background actor is not really "acting". But then again it does pay the bills and I can put it on my acting resume, which ain't bad. The more credits I collect, then I can send those head shots of mine to other casting directors. Get into some non-union film. I've realised that being SAG may not be such a good choice. Once you're a SAG member, I've learned from other actors, is a double edged sword. You get paid more for being a background actor, but you get less work because you get paid more. And you won't be able to act in any non-union films, which means you will have less creative choices. It just means that you're bound to only work in signatory projects. It sucks because let's say there's a brilliant script out there and you want to do it, but it's a non-union film. Then you're shit out of luck and other actors will get to act in it, and not you. Oh well...I think I'll stay non-union then.


I also think I should stick working in Production. At least that way, you get to know the producers, directors, and you get to speak to the principal actors without having them look at you as low-lifes.

Purple Folder

Craaaap!!! I lost my purple clear folder! It had my timecard in it. Grrr...I will probably have to get that re-done. I have my copy of it...maybe I can trace it and no one will notice. Alright Viv...calm down...

I think I might have left it at the Big Little Theatre. Otherwise, who would steal such a thing??? I mean it's available at Staples for crying out loud!

I've got to stop having these long nights where I get to bed at 1am. It's really tough when you're at work and your eyes are rolling backwards because your body wants to sleep.

What do you mean you can't tell if it's a sinus infection or not?

So the doctor at Roosevelt Hospital shined a light into my nose and still wasn't able to tell me whether I had a sinus infection or not. I mean it's weird, but the swelling went down and I don't look like I had a stroke on the right side of my face anymore, but it still was painful when I pressed down. I went to the dentist, they took an x-ray. They said it wasn't a cavity. If the pain is still here and it hasn't gotten better, the doctor will order a cat scan. Can you imagine how expensive that is???

I'm thinking of going back to work at Barnes and Noble just for the sake of having health insurance again. I could work there part-time and still be able to take care of myself for a minimal cost. That just means I will have to work 7 days a week, but....health insurance!!!! There is a Barnes and Noble in Park Slope where I live so I'm thinknig of working there. Maybe I can work in the Cafe again.

I am very wary of doing this play of mine that I have just been cast. The director/producer says that if I don't bring in people to see it, he will cancel it that very night. Sounds sketchy...but the company seem legit. I think he may just be doing it to make money for himself and that he's hiring just anyone who walks in. My roommate, Morgan, brought up the point that he may not have been casting good actors, just anyone who wanted to act. There are too many scam artists out here and I'm sick of it. I recognise most scam artists, but those who don't ask for money from you, I figured it's better right? Is that really true? And I have no one I trust to go to for this.

Sinusitis

Eughh....this is the weirdest sinus infection I have to date. The last time I had a sinus infection, I was 12 and it was all over my cheeks. Left and right. It was soo bad that I couldn't even sleep at night. The pain....the swelling....the post nasal drip. Ewww...
Well this time it's a little different. I think it was caused by my cold and the fact that I had an infected tooth that was removed. It's in the same location. Well, it's right between my right nostril and my cheekbone. It's all swollen and very painful. It only hurts when I smile. :-( The dentist took an x-ray of my teeth and said that I didnt' have any bad ones. The symptoms all point to it being a sinus infection. This sucks big time. Well, I guess it was going to happen since it's been 2 years being out of college and having only had 1 instance where I got health insurance. Maybe I could go to work at Barnes and Noble in Park Slope during the weekends only to get health insurance. I don't have anything to do during the weekends anyway.

But the good news here is that I have been called back from one of my auditions. Yea! I was at the Big Little Theatre and the director wanted me to come back the day after. He wants me to write a few lines for the monologue. Yeah, it's weird and I don't know why. But that's what I'm going to do and he said he'd work with me on it. :-\
The second is for a New York Film Academy Short Film. I'm going to play The Nurse. It's going to be silly madness in this video. It's called "Pregnancy Surprise".
I told my father about this and he had only good things to say to me. He said that it was great news and that he knew I would succeed and that he had confidence in me. His words right there mean more to me than anything I've ever gotten from him. This will definitely be enough to fuel my own confidence when going out to audition and trying to get jobs.

That was my weekend. Oh, and watched Pan's Labyrinth this weekend. In fact, it was on Saturday that I watched it and right in the middle of the movie that's when my sinus infection flared up and I almost passed out from the pain. Never a dull moment in this girl's life. One thing after another. The movie really scared me and yet touched me at the same time. Scary and Sad. I have to say that there is one scene where I think it was just thrown in there for the sake of seeing a monster come to life. It was really unnecessary. I did think the action sequences were done very well. I really shuddered when I saw them shooting people in the head with guns and the blade scene.

Finished Wrapping

So the movie has wrapped. I'm working at a national legal firm as a temp for the time being. I had trouble getting into the office today. I get a call from a former employer asking if I can work today and of course I can't because I'm in the temp office already. I feel like I'm behind bars. Why am I a slave to money? I wish I wasn't dependent on money. I wish I was living in the East Village in the 70s because you could work for spit at that time.

So I'm at Osric's magic eight ball online. I asked the question of whether The Guitar will fair well and the answer I received was: "Don't count on it." Yikes...well especially since I didn't receive the last 2 week's pay while I was there. This is ridiculous.

I need to get back into working in the entertainment industry. FAST...but Backstage is being a bitch. 6 months ago I tried to subscribe online and it gave me an internal 500 error. Now I'm just stuck using Mandy and Playbill. At least for the time being. Until they respond to my email and my voicemail. *sigh*

That's pretty much all I can do. *sigh* *sigh* *sigh*